Up until last year my husband and I were not in the best position for several years. We made very little money and lived with family. We have two children who are now 8 and almost 7. They were both happy accidents. After my second child I got an IUD to make sure we did not have any more until we were ready to. We had always talked about having one more when the time was right. My husband was on the road to promotion at his job. When that happened we would be able to get back out on our own and would be financially stable. So we decided that when that happened we would try for another child.
Well things took longer than expected, as they usually do. I took a few years longer than we expected. So here we are now doing well and in our own home. Things are pretty good and we are finally stable, comfortable even. However, now we do not know if it is a good idea or not. Here are our issues: First off, we are older than we thought we would be when this happened. I am 34 and my husband will be 37 soon. I know lots of people have children into their 30's, but we started aging it out and realized that we would be in our 50's when that child graduated high school! Our parents were in their 40's when they became grandparents. Second thing is that our boys are now 8 and almost 7 and in school. We are in a new chapter of parenting. We are so far removed from diapers, up all night, bottles, ect.. We can now do different things because we don't have a baby or toddler. We are not sure about going back to that. Third thing is money. We are finally at a point where a flat tire won't ruin us for months. I am worried that we will put ourselves back into a financial rut if we have another child. We are at a point where we can afford to do things with our children, we can throw them birthday parties. Is it fair to them. They just got used to our lifestyle as it is now, just for us to tighten it up? So here are our issues. When we talk about it these are the things that we think about. I am worried that today's logic will turn into tomorrow's regret. We have this whole list of cons, but then there is the thing on the other side that we just can not get past....
But we want to have another one!
Well things took longer than expected, as they usually do. I took a few years longer than we expected. So here we are now doing well and in our own home. Things are pretty good and we are finally stable, comfortable even. However, now we do not know if it is a good idea or not. Here are our issues: First off, we are older than we thought we would be when this happened. I am 34 and my husband will be 37 soon. I know lots of people have children into their 30's, but we started aging it out and realized that we would be in our 50's when that child graduated high school! Our parents were in their 40's when they became grandparents. Second thing is that our boys are now 8 and almost 7 and in school. We are in a new chapter of parenting. We are so far removed from diapers, up all night, bottles, ect.. We can now do different things because we don't have a baby or toddler. We are not sure about going back to that. Third thing is money. We are finally at a point where a flat tire won't ruin us for months. I am worried that we will put ourselves back into a financial rut if we have another child. We are at a point where we can afford to do things with our children, we can throw them birthday parties. Is it fair to them. They just got used to our lifestyle as it is now, just for us to tighten it up? So here are our issues. When we talk about it these are the things that we think about. I am worried that today's logic will turn into tomorrow's regret. We have this whole list of cons, but then there is the thing on the other side that we just can not get past....
But we want to have another one!
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