Mommy?....Tara!

It is 7 am and I am sitting here in complete silence. My children are gone for a few days with family. The first time ever. As I watched them drive away this morning all of the sudden all of these feelings came rushing to me. What if they needed me? What if Gavin got leg cramps? Would they know what to do to make him feel better? What if Aiden got scared at night? Would they know just how to cuddle him to make him feel better? I ran down the list of what if's for quite some time while putting on a happy carefree smile. As if I was totally fine with them leaving without us. Don't get me wrong, I completely trust the people they are with. However, through no fault of their own.... they are not me. That sounded a little conceded which I am not at all, but when it comes to being mommy I guess we all think that no one can kiss those boo boo's better than we can.

Ok.. so now that I got past that.... now what? Who am I when I am not "mommy"? I have no idea! I have been "mommy" for the past 8 1/2 years straight now. Before that I was 24 years old. I am definitely not that girl anymore. I honestly have no idea what I will do with my time today. The next two days I have errands to run...child free errands! My husband is working late tonight and then during the day tomorrow. So it will just be me....in the quiet. Boy it's quiet. Man I knew my kids were kind of loud, but wow. I had no idea lol. I am still unsure of what I will do today, but whatever it is... Tara will do it!